*mmddyyyy Sample Reminders *-------- ------------------------------------------------------------ ! 27 Pay the mortgage! R0128 Mom's Birthday February 5th R0226 Alyssa's Birthday March 4th R0501 Daryl's Birthday May 9th R0917 Dad's Brithday September 23rd R0310 Taxes in one month! R0414 Taxes due tomorrow! R0415 Taxes due by midnite! *---------------------------------------------------------------------- * These sayings come from four sources: * The Speaker's Desk Book (1937) * Bartlett's Familiar Quotations (1944) * A program called HI (no author or history known) *---------------------------------------------------------------------- Q0101 Minds are like parachutes, they only work when open. Q0102 Every Titanic has its iceberg. Q0103 An honest politician: One who stays bought. Q0104 A closed mouth gathers no foot. Q0105 What`s the most popular form of birth control? The headache. Q0106 Clean mind, clean body: take your pick. Q0107 Whatever advice you give, be brief. Q0108 He who laughs last probably doesn`t understand the joke. Q0109 Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday. Q0110 If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average. Q0111 When in doubt, make it sound convincing. Q0112 A Smith and Wesson beats four aces. Q0113 When all else fails, read the directions. Q0114 If your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt. Q0115 If reality wants to get in touch with me, it knows where I am. Q0116 When forced to choose between two evils, try the new one. Q0201 Every human being comes equipped with a brain at no extra cost. Q0202 To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools. Q0203 To save one life is better than to build a seven story pagoda. Q0204 To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult, to criticize the competent. Q0205 There`s so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me. Q0206 There`s at least one fool in every married couple. Q0207 There is always someone worse off than yourself. Q0208 The wise shepherd never trusts his flock to a smiling wolf. Q0209 The weed of crime bears bitter fruit. Q0210 Statistics are often used as a drunk uses a light pole: For support rather than illumination. Q0301 The plural of spouse is spice. Q0302 The only rose without thorns is friendship. Q0303 The minute a man is convinced that he is interesting, he isn`t. Q0304 The light of a hundred stars doesn't equal the light of the moon. Q0305 He who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn`t been asleep. Q0306 The hardest thing to do is to disquise your feelings when sending a large crowd of visiting relatives home. Q0307 The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue. Q0308 The best prophet of the future is the past. Q0309 The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away. Q0310 The attacker must vanquish; the defender need only survive. Q0401 The average woman would rather be beautiful than smart because the average man can see better than he can think. Q0402 That must be wonderful! I dont understand it at all. Q0403 Someone whom you reject today, will reject you tomorrow. Q0404 Someone is speaking well of you. Q0405 Some rise by sin and some by virtue fall. Q0406 No great scoundrel is ever uninteresting. Q0426 Too much of a good thing is wonderful. Q0501 Some men are discovered; others are found out. Q0502 Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all. Q0503 When all is said and done, too many people keep on saying and doing. Q0504 Fame is proof that people are gullible. Q0505 We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Q0506 No really great man every thought himself so. Q0507 There is as much greatness in acknowledging a good turn, as there is in doing it. Q0508 Beware of hip and rum drivers. Q0509 Home to a young boy is merely a filling station. Q0510 Early to rise and ditto to bed, make a man healthy, but socially dead. Q0511 Beware the man who can't be bothered with details. Q0512 Nothing beats reading a good book when there is work to do. Q0513 While forbidden fruit may be sweeter, it spoils faster. Q0514 You're smart when you only believe half of what you hear, Wise is when you know which half to believe. Q0515 A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval. Q0528 When seeking love give nothing, Having found love give all. Q0530 In gallant trim the gilded vessel goes, Youth on the bow, Pleasure at the helm. Q0531 If she had lumbago she couldn't sing a note. Q0601 Show affection, it will probably meet with pleasant response. Q0602 Share your happiness with others today. Q0603 She`s learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time trying to put into words. Q0604 Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth. Q0605 People will buy anything that`s one to a customer. Q0606 Ours is a world where people don`t know what they want and are willing to go through hell to get it. Q0607 One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true. Q0608 One family builds a wall, two families enjoy it. Q0609 Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal. Q0610 Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature. Q0611 Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest. Q0612 No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish. Q0613 Never say you know a man until you have divided an inheritance with him. Q0614 Mistakes are oft the stepping stones to failure. Q0615 Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate. Q0616 Might as well be frank, monsieur. It would take a miracle to get you out of Casablanca. Q0617 Matrimony is the root of all evil. Q0618 Many a family tree needs trimming. Q0619 Man and wife make one fool. Q0620 Man`s horizons are bounded by his vision. Q0621 Make new friends but keep the old, One is silver the other gold. Q0622 Make a wish, it might come true. Q0623 Love is sentimental measles. Q0624 Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. Q0625 Lend money to a bad debtor and he will hate you. Q0626 Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday. Q0627 Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage. Q0628 The heart is wiser than the intellect. Q0629 May the force be with you. Q0630 It`s a poor workman who blames his tools. Q0701 It`s clever, but is it art? Q0702 It is far better to be deceived than to be undeceived by those we love. Q0703 It is Fortune, not wisdom that rules man`s life. Q0704 The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag. Q0705 If you wish to succeed, consult three old people. Q0706 If you make a mistake, immediately fix it to the best of your ability. Q0707 If you continually give you will continually have. Q0708 Quit work and play for once. Q0709 If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it. Q0710 I`ve given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself. Q0711 The orator speaks, with his flood of words and his drop of reason. Q0712 He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else. Q0713 He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet. Q0714 He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals. Q0715 He walks as if balancing the family tree on his nose. Q0716 He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another`s mishap. Q0717 He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides. Q0718 Even a hawk is an eagle among crows. Q0719 By following the good, you learn to be good. Q0720 Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clear through. Q0721 An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it. Q0722 The picture of health requires a happy frame of mind. Q0723 All who would win joy must share it, happiness was born a twin. Q0724 No one is so happy or sad as he imagines. Q0725 Every anarchist is a baffled dictator. Q0726 An institution is the lengthened shadow of one man. Q0727 He cannot rule the great who cannot rule the small. Q0728 No facts are sacred, none are profane. Q0729 Faith will not die while seed catalogs are printed. Q0730 Public speaking takes a two minute idea, and a two hour vocabulary. Q0731 All work and no play makes jack. And lots of it. Q0801 God gives us relatives; thank God we can chose our friends. Q0802 Fortune truly helps those who are of good judgment. Q0803 Faith goes out through the window when beauty comes in at the door. Q0804 Everything bows to success, even grammar. Q0805 Everyone complains of his memory, no one of his judgment. Q0806 Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark. Q0807 Cheap things are of no value, valuable things are not cheap. Q0808 Behind every argument is someone`s ignorance. Q0809 Beauty seldom recommends one woman to another. Q0810 A wise man can see more from a the bottom of a well than a fool can see from a mountaintop. Q0811 Fear is the tax that conscience pays to guilt. Q0812 Only the doctor can suffer from good health. Q0813 Communism will work when love, not greed, inspires it. Q0814 Democracy will continue as long as people have faith in the people they are going to elect next. Q0815 The desire to work is confined to classified ads. Q0816 God never imposes a duty without giving time to do it. Q0817 Thrift is a wonderful virtue - in an ancestor. Q0818 If we were intended to talk more than we hear, we'd have two mouths and only one ear. Q0819 Better to be religious with your eloquence, than eloquent with your religion. Q0820 Freedom has a thousand charms to show, that slaves, however content, will never know. Q0821 The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our change. Q0822 Of all the ills that men endure, hope is the only cheap and universal cure. Q0823 If you bow at all, bow low. Q0824 Toil is most pleasant when done. Q0825 Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more. Q0826 A minister says matrimony should be enduring. It is. Q0827 No man can serve two masters, yes-men can serve hundreds. Q0828 A good man gone wrong is usually a bad man found out. Q0829 Losing weight: the triumph of mind over platter. Q0830 To get ahead and stay ahead, use your head. Q0831 A fool and his money are invited everywhere. Q0901 Do not clog intellect`s sluices with knowledge of questionable uses. Q0902 Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won`t see his face. Q0903 Creditors have much better memories than debtors. Q0904 A man without a God is like a fish without a bicycle. Q0905 A plucked goose doesn`t lay golden eggs. Q0906 Hearts will never be practical til they're unbreakable. Q0907 They do not love that do not show their love. Q0908 Better three hours too soon than a minute too late. Q0909 Honi soit qui mal y pense. (Shamed be he who thinks evil of it.) Q0910 Ideals kill some men in politics, but politics kill more ideals in men. Q0911 Ignorance is the mother of superstition. Q0912 No woman should imitate men; men are not worth it. Q0913 At 18, I was ashamed of how ignorant my father was. At 21, I was amazed at how much he had learned in three years. Q0914 Most campaign literature is an insult to intelligence. Sad that many never realize it. Q0915 You can judge a man by how he keeps his golf score. Q0916 America did not invent human rights, Human Rights invented America. Q0917 The reason people blame things on previous generations? There's only one other choice! Q0918 Inflation is when the buck doesn't stop anywhere. Q0922 One disadvantage of having nothing to do: You can't stop and rest. Q0923 Real love stories have no endings. Q1001 Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius. Q1002 Justice delayed is justice denied. Q1003 They know enough who know how to learn. Q1004 The laborer is worthy of his hire, if his labor is. Q1005 Love is blind, to everything except fat. Q1006 A husband is the medicine that cures all the ills of girlhood. Q1007 Pale ink beats a good memory. Q1008 Would that government spent our money like it was their own. Q1009 Music is the only sensual pleasure without vice. Q1010 If you want the last word with a woman, apologize. Q1011 Just because he's on the road, it doesn't mean his mind is. Q1012 Death and taxes may always be with us, But at least death doesn't get any worse. Q1101 A guy has to get fresh once in a while so a girl doesn't lose her confidence. Q1102 I ain`t broke, but I`m badly bent. Q1103 The best government teaches us to govern ourselves. Q1104 The bigger the bankroll, the tighter the band around it. Q1105 Are you a good witch, or are you a bad witch? Q1106 Blessed are the peacemakers, they will never want for work. Q1107 Bachelor's wives and spinster's children are always perfect. Q1108 Better the shoulder to the wheel than the back to the wall. Q1109 Whatever you have, spend less. Q1110 In fashion be a reed in the wind, In principles be a rock in the stream. Q1111 He was a bold man that first ate an oyster. Q1112 The fewer the facts, the stronger the opinion. Q1113 Learning music by reading about it, Is like making love by mail. Q1114 Think you've got influence? Try commanding someone else's dog. Q1121 Character is what you know you are, Not what others think you are. Q1125 Don't need a new religion, haven't used the old one up yet. Q1126 There are two sides to every question, politicians take both. Q1127 Politics is either passing the buck or passing the dough. Q1128 To make pleasures pleasant, shorten them. Q1129 Never despair. If you do, you work on in despair. Q1130 Too many pray for peace with their fists clenched. Q1201 Two wrongs do not make a right, it usually takes three or more. Q1202 Lost interest? It`s so bad I`ve lost apathy. Q1203 The greatest programming project of all took six days; on the seventh day the programmer rested. Q1204 The only red menace in America is the sunburn. Q1205 Every noble work is at first impossible. Q1206 To reform a man, begin with his grandmother. Q1207 No man's religion ever survives his morals. Q1208 Who to himself is law, no law doth need. Q1209 Selfishness is that vice we see in others, never in ourselves. Q1210 Equality of the sexes leaves women standing on buses. Q1211 Never borrow trouble, the interest is entirely too high. Q1212 To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved. Q1213 It is better to live rich than to die rich. Q1223 Take a lesson from the weather: It pays no attention to criticism. Q1228 No one really knows enough to be a pessimist. Q1229 You are not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others.