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        ³    JENKINS' TEN LAWS OF BUSINESS SURVIVAL     ³
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             By Michael D. Jenkins, CPA and Attorney
             ---------------------------------------

  .  THE FIRST LAW:   "Never trust a bookkeeper who comes
                      to work in a chauffeured Rolls-Royce."

  .  THE SECOND LAW:  "A dollar borrowed is a dollar
                      earned."

  .  THE THIRD LAW:   "Steal only the best."

  .  THE FOURTH LAW:  "Never invest in anything except your
                      own business.  Otherwise, always keep
                      all your money hidden under your
                      mattress, where only the government
                      can steal it."

  .  THE FIFTH LAW:   "Never trust a naked certified public
                      accountant.  Or one with clothes on."

  .  THE SIXTH LAW:   "Never, ever, trust anybody named
                      Larry, Sammy, or Lenny."

  .  THE SEVENTH LAW: "Never trust a treacherous, conniv-
                      ing, thieving, claim-jumping, well-
                      poisoning, witness-suborning lawyer." *

  .  THE EIGHTH LAW:  "A limited partnership is a business
                      arrangement where, at the outset, the
                      limited partners have the money, and
                      the general partners have the experi-
                      ence, and at the end, the roles are
                      reversed.  Try to remember that."

  .  THE NINTH LAW:   "Never forget that the bureaucrat who
                      smiles when something goes seriously
                      wrong has already found someone to
                      blame it on."

  .  THE TENTH LAW:   "If it's important, always get it in
                      writing up front.  Your own mother
                      will cheat you blind if you don't."
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     (* There is a corollary to the Seventh Law, which
        holds that "All lawyers are treacherous, conniving,
        thieving, claim-jumping, well-poisoning, witness-
        suborning &!#*#-*@&*#)#*%&*#$%es.")